"The sport of not getting tickets"

[Zombie Master]

This is the title of a book written by Philip Funnell, he had a very extensively stocked Beemer shop for several decades. He also is a long distance, all terrain rider of great renown. He would talk me out of buying a new bike, sell me tires and maintenance parts, and tell me to go ride it!

I will use this post to extract some passages. Let me know if you like them!

License Plate

Don't make the rear of your motorcycle distinctive. Avoid decals or signs as CDN or U.S.A. Try to arrange a shadow over a dirty faded license plate. Secure the plate with a zap-strap, leaving its tabs untrimmed over the plate. Perhaps put on an elastic band cut from an inner tube on each end of the plate about one inch in. This is justified when the license plates are of thin material which often fractures around the bolt holes. The bands dampen the vibration and secure the plate. Coat the inside of the lens in your tail light which illuminates the plate with some dust. However, don't make it too obvious. A muddy plate with the grit and slat from last winter on an immaculate motorcycle in mid summer is a dead give away, and in itself an offense. You can also wash a new plate with some strong bleach and a little abrasive cleaner which might pale it a bit.

[Chuey]

Oh, he's using the rule book to his advantage. It's a good tactic for competition. It's a jungle out there but I think that's only good if you're going to run from the cops, right? My jacket glows in the dark. I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

Chuey

[ME 109]

I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

I did once nyuk nyuk nyuk! But it was daytime.........and I don't own a lighthouse jacket.

[Zombie Master]

The book is full size 8X11, 250 pages of riding science. It's just not about getting away with speeding. The book used to be called: "Scientific Motorcycling." It was published, but I think he had to change the name so he could sell it himself. I bought the book 25 or more years ago and studied it. I lent it to a friends wife, who divorced him, and never got it back. I bumped in to Fuzzy at Redmond (BMW rally) and he had a few copies with him. He did show up on an Airhead and he's an old bugger. I finally got the book back!

There are 10 pages of indexed subjects. 17 sections.

An example

Section 2 MOTORCYCLE NEEDS

Steering
Handling
Engine width
The Basics
Trail
Frame strength
Fork strength
Tires
Rider Input
The effect
Wheel size
Free movement
Stability
Stability at speed
Component condition
Fairings
The effect


Under Rider Input he writes:

A totally rigid frame to fork connections and perfectly parallel forks is an ideal as yet unbuilt. The rider must learn just how much extra twist to impart to the handlebars, and instinctively adjust the feel or feedback information. Handlebar position, width and distance back from the center of the steering axis, and with too much leverage, the touch will be too delicate, making control over rough roads too sensitive.

[Zombie Master]

Oh

, he's using the rule book to his advantage. It's a good tactic for competition. It's a jungle out there but I think that's only good if you're going to run from the cops, right?

I think the concept is to avoid and/or confuse the cops. An experienced expert rider should not have the same restrictions as the general public. We can use our skill to avoid problems that shouldn't be foisted on us.

My jacket glows in the dark.

This attention seeking dress, does have it's drawbacks. Personally I go for stealth.

I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

If it's an opaque bush....what the problem?

[She'llbe]

I always avoid the police and assume they are all confused in one way or another that has to be some form of dementia. NSW police are very selective as to which laws they police on any given day

[Major Softie]

I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

If it's an opaque bush....what the problem?

Attracts Moses.

[Zombie Master]

I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

If it's an opaque bush....what the problem?

Attracts Moses.

Well, there is that.

[vanzen]

Oh, he's using the rule book to his advantage. It's a good tactic for competition. It's a jungle out there but I think that's only good if you're going to run from the cops, right?

I think the concept is to avoid and/or confuse the cops. An experienced expert rider should not have the same restrictions as the general public. We can use our skill to avoid problems that shouldn't be foisted on us.

Skill is an advantage – but it's still a jungle.
Rather than bless riders with privileges –
just get the inept riders / drivers off the road ! PLEASE !

My jacket glows in the dark.

This attention seeking dress, does have it's drawbacks. Personally I go for stealth.

Invisibility to the Law will be of secondary importance IMO.
Being visible to the inept masses is job #1.

I can't even entertain the thought of hiding behind a bush as the cops go speeding past!

If it's an opaque bush....what the problem?

Evasion and obstruction ?
Buy a jacket with vertical reflective strips – no one will see you when you are behind bars ...


ZM – sounds a good book (I'll want to find a copy !)

[Zombie Master]

I see Shails BMW in Vancouver BC has them.

http://www.shailsmotorcycles.com/index. ... itstart=30

Look on the accessories.

I read this book 25 years ago and it helped me become a better rider. If you know a new rider that has the ability to study this subject from a text with diagrams, I think this book would be very helpful.